The Broken Vow
by Rowen-Bells
Summary: "You ask me to meet you...and like a moth to the flame, I am drawn here. Drawn to you. Unable to deny you a simple request and yet scared of the consequences..." *ONE-SHOT* Rated M


**_(A/N)_**_ Firstly, Bioware own's everything, I just like to play. This is a short One-shot that I wrote when I was frustrated with another story I was working on. I hadn't planned to post it as really it was just a way to get my mind off the other story. But hey, plans change :) I hope you enjoy it. Please let me know what you think!_

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**The Broken Vow**

She took the stairs with quick determination, glancing briefly up at the two monumental bronze statues that sat high upon the ledges of the building that overlooked the estates of Hightown. It was dark out, and she made sure to move within the shadows, not wanting to be seen. Only the moon would witness her steps. She pushed open the grand doors of the cathedral, walking quickly into the great hall within. The high ceilings gave a feeling as if they would go on forever, though she knew they did not. The heavy wooden doors closed loudly behind her as she walked closer to the altar in front of her, her bare feet treading soundlessly upon the stone floor. Taking a glance around, she saw that the Chantry was empty. This pleased her. She had hoped that the time of night she had picked would be late enough to ensure that the inhabitants who resided here were asleep.

At night the inside of the Chantry was lit with several candles, casting an eerie glow upon the statues and sending shadows dancing in the corners. Her stomach twisted with each step she took. She wrapped her arms around herself, steeling herself against the urge to turn around. She couldn't. She wouldn't. In her haste to get here, she had not bothered to put her long dark chocolate locks up as she usually did. Instead she let them frame her face as they swept along her shoulders and cascaded down her back. She had also not changed out of the night dress she wore, and now the already form fitting white fabric clung to her skin, showing off her curves, due to the sweltering heat of the summer's night air. At least the stone within the cathedral was cool underneath her feet. She took another step forward. She knew that if she turned around now, she would never come back . . . and failure had never been an option for her. Not when she was saving her family from the downfall of Lothering, and not when she was faced with returning to the Deep Roads to search for the Grey Warden that would save her sister.

But this was something different. This was not something that she could easily defeat by using her twin fangs. In fact, she had left them at home. Her heart hammered in her chest as she got closer to the massive altar, her eyes lingering briefly on the tapestry that hung from the banister. Unlike most people, she did not feel at ease here. She didn't know if it was because of the fact that she had once been attacked by templar's here or whether it was just the upbringing she had had, what with her father and sister both being apostates. Whatever the reason, it just felt ominous to her. But even that she pushed aside. She would have to if this were to go as she wanted it to.

As she began to slowly climb the steps leading up to the altar, she caught a flash of white and her heart jumped. So he had come. She hadn't been sure that he would, given the last time they had talked. In fact, she had lain in bed back at her estate wondering if she should even bother getting up as she was almost certain he wouldn't be here. She had decided to go at the last minute, the desire and curiosity winning out, which was why she had not had time to change into more appropriate attire. As she made her last few silent steps to the landing, she stopped . . . unsure of where to go from here. And for the first time ever, she was unsure of herself. He had his back to her, looking up at the statue that stood against the back of the altar, overseeing the entire Chantry. She couldn't help but feel the statue's gaze was one of judgment and not a look of compassion as others seemed to believe. Turning her eyes away quickly, she focused once more on the man in front of her. He wore a simple pair of brown leather pants and a white flowing shirt. She tried to remember if she had ever seen him dressed so casual before. She realized she had not. She had only ever seen him in his armor.

"I am going to guess that you did not want me to meet you here to pray, Jade." He spoke, still not turning around to look at her.

She said nothing. She had thought about what she would say several times, but now that she was here . . . words seemed to fail her. Slowly he turned around to face her. His usually striking blue eyes seemed much darker here in the shadow of the statue behind him, but she did not miss where his eyes lingered before they met hers.

"We could pray," she said softly, walking forward and stopping in front of him. She held his gaze as he turned with her back toward the statue. She knew that usually one knelt when praying to the Maker, but neither of them did this time. Both of them merely looked up at the magnificent bronze statue of Andraste as he began to speak.

"Blessed are they who stand before the corrupt and the wicked and do not falter. Blessed are the peacekeepers, the champions of the just." He recited.

"Maker watch over us," she whispered in response to his prayer. She turned to look at him and saw that he had his eyes closed, his brow furrowed as a frown tugged at the corner of his full lips. She wanted to ask him what was causing him such inner turmoil but she feared his answer. Instead she remained silent. It was some time before he spoke again, his words barely above a whisper.

"The first of the Maker's children watched across the Veil and grew jealous of the life they could not feel. Could not . . . _touch_. In blackest envy were the demons born." Though he was barely audible, she knew the meaning behind his words.

"One does not have to become a demon, Sebastian." She whispered, turning her body toward him.

Opening his eyes, he turned and smiled down at her. "No, one does not." He sighed. "But that does not make it any less of a sin in the eyes of the Maker to covet that which you have vowed to give up."

"And what have you coveted?" she asked, her breath hitching in her throat as her green eyes found his intense crystalline gaze. It felt as if a flutter of butterflies had taken flight within the pit of her stomach.

Reaching forward, he cupped her face in his strong hand, tenderly stroking her jaw line with his thumb. A sad smile played on his lips. "I think you already know the answer to that question, Jade."

She bit her lip as she pressed her face into his hand, enjoying the feel of his hot skin on hers. But just as quickly as he had touched her, he was already backing away. He shook his head as he turned, leaving her standing alone. She wasn't sure why, but she felt abandoned in that fleeting moment. Like she was losing him before she had even gotten him. She stood there rejected as he ran his hands roughly through his short deep brown hair, stopping several feet away. He turned suddenly, the determination plain on his face as he strode quickly back to where she stood.

"Do you know what you do to me Jade?" He asked, and she was taken away by the passion in his voice. "What I go through every time you're around me? Because of you, I question the Maker and his beliefs . . . I question the vows I once made! And then you ask me to meet you here . . . and like a moth to the flame, I am drawn here. Drawn to you. Unable to deny you a simple request, and yet scared of the consequences!"

He sighed. Whether with exasperation or anger, she was not sure, but she felt as if she could only stand there silently as he raked his fingers roughly through his hair once more. She had never seen him like this; angry and full of passion. It stirred in her a deep desire . . . but it scared her at the same time. She wanted to let him talk though. Not just because she loved the sound of his voice, with his Starkhaven accent, but because she wanted to know how he felt about her, be it good or bad. That was why she had asked him to meet her. She had to know. He knew how she felt . . . and now it was his turn to tell her how he felt. Reaching forward, he took her hand in his and brought it to his chest. She could feel the heat of his skin through the light white fabric he wore.

"When we last talked and you told me how you felt . . . I prayed. A lot." He began. "I asked the Maker for guidance . . . and for the first time ever, I found myself angry that he didn't respond."

"But, Sebastian . . ." she said slowly.

"I know," He cut her off quickly. "The Maker has never responded to anyone but Andraste. We are expected to believe that He knows what is best for us. That if we give our life to Him, trust fully in Him, our path will always be clear. But . . ."

Sebastian looked down at his chest where he held her hand captive, words seeming to fail him. Jade took a tentative step forward, closing the already small gap between them. She wasn't sure what it was that she was planning to do, so she surprised even herself as she reached up with her free hand and gripped the back of his neck. He did not resist the slight pressure from her fingers, lowering his head into the nook of her neck and shoulder. He snaked his own free hand around her waist as he nuzzled her collarbone, holding her tightly. She held him in her embrace, trying her best to comfort him. She reveled at the feel of his lips grazing against her neck, and shivered with pleasure as his hot breath tickled her throat. But even with him in her arms, she couldn't overcome her feeling of guilt.

"I am sorry that I have caused you turmoil," she whispered. "The Maker must be able to understand that we cannot help who we . . ." She trailed off unsure of how to finish that. No, that wasn't completely true. She just wasn't sure she was ready to say it. Not out loud to him anyway. Last time she had told him that she cared for him and wanted to be with him . . . he had avoided her for a week. She didn't think she could handle that kind of rejection again.

Sebastian pulled his head back, but did not let go of her waist or hand. His blue eyes searched her face. "I do not blame you, Jade. I blame myself for being weak."

"How are you weak? You have done nothing wrong!" She meant it. This was the closest they had ever come to one another, and it was the first time they had ever held each other as they did now. "In fact, I think you've been a lot stronger than you think."

He smiled down at her, shaking his head. "If only you knew."

"Then tell me!" She pleaded, desperate to know what he was thinking. What he was feeling.

He mulled over her request for awhile. She had begun to think that he planned to say nothing when finally he spoke. "What would you say if I told you that I think about you? And not just every so often, but all the time? That I think of us and how it would be . . . to be with you."

"I would say . . . that I like the sound of that." Jade said slowly, trying to hide the excitement she felt at his words.

"But I am a Brother of the Chantry," he sighed. "When I made my vows, I made them with every intent of keeping them. I thought . . . I thought that I was done with the part of my life that had once thrived on the frivolous things the world offered. Booze, partying . . . the touch of a women . . ." At this, he reached up and trailed a finger slowly down her cheek. "But that was before I met you Jade. I can go without the other things . . . but I don't think I can go without you. Not anymore. I can't seem to win this battle."

"Then stop fighting it," Jade insisted beseechingly, pressing her body firmly against his. Closing his eyes, his own body stiffened at her touch.

"Maker forgive me for what I am about to do." He whispered.

Jade didn't have the chance to ask what he was talking about, as at that moment he reached forward quickly, and taking her face in both his hands, pressed his lips firmly to hers. The kiss had surprised her, but she quickly returned his sudden affection in fervor. He held her against him, refusing to let her back away and she could feel his hard chest through the thin fabric she wore as she wrapped her arms around him, perfectly content with him never letting go. Her body tingled at his very touch. She couldn't get enough, and neither could he it seemed. They only pulled apart when they both began panting for air. Even then, his lips trailed down her neck, and she felt a tug on the gown she wore as he exposed her shoulder so that his lips could continue further.

"If I do this," he said quietly, moving his lips back up her neck and then looking deeply into her eyes. "Break my vows . . . I will be cast from the Chantry as a sinner in the eyes of the Maker. I will gladly do this for you Jade. I cannot deny that I love you any longer. But I need to know . . ."

"I love you," she said without hesitation before he could finish, elated that he had finally admitted his true feelings, leaving her open to admit her own.

Sebastian smiled down at her, his blue eyes shining. "Then I will fight it no longer. I will follow you."

Standing on her toes, she kissed him once more before taking his hand in hers and leading him down the stone steps away from the altar. His footsteps fell slightly heavier than hers on the stone floor, sending a quiet echo through the hall. As they reached the large wooden doors, Sebastian turned her around and, pressing her against them, kissed her long and hard. Her heart exploded as she stood stuck between his perfectly sculpted body and the hard door against her back. She didn't want this to end, but she knew it must. With a seductive smile, she pushed him away and opened the door. Together they made their way out into the night. Again they kept to the shadows as they stole down the steps and into the Chantry courtyard. They had not made it far when Jade was overwhelmed with an insatiable need to have him in her arms. Turning around, she pushed him back against a stone wall, her hands caressing his chest as her lips found his throat, jaw, and then mouth. She could feel his body quiver under her touch and she smiled. Wrapping his arms tightly around her, she was nearly lifted off her feet as he sought to satiate his own need. Finally with great effort, she pulled away from him once more, giggling as a low groan escaped his throat.

Hand in hand, they once more ran through the dark streets of Hightown. Luckily, it was not that much longer before they were at Jade's estate. As she opened the door, however, Sebastian stopped abruptly. Turning around, Jade saw the hesitation that marred his handsome face. Going to him, she cupped his face in her hands.

"Don't worry," she said reassuringly. "This is right. Even the Maker will realize this."

"It's not that," he said slowly. "It's just . . . has been a long time since . . . since I have been with a woman."

Jade looked at his worried and nervous face and smiled reassuringly. "We will go slow," she promised.

Taking him by the hand, she turned and led him through the house, up the stairs, and to her room. Her heart was racing and she felt unsure of herself as well, but she tried not to let it show as she led him to her bed. Turning to face him, her breath caught in her throat at the intense look he was giving her. He seemed to have that affect on her. She could tell he was nervous like she was, but he was also determined. She took a sharp breath as he moved toward her, his blue eyes burning with desire as he slowly lowered his head to meet her lips. She could tell he was trying to pace himself. His soft full lips barely grazed hers and he pulled back just as she moved forward. Her eyes met his and he grinned. He was teasing her! It was with great effort that she kept from pouncing on him. She could feel her need for him burning inside her. She _craved_ him.

She wondered if her yearning showed through on her face. She didn't care. Stepping forward, it was as if something snapped in both of them. Reaching forward, she frantically removed his shirt as he tore at the gown she wore. Her hands trembled with excitement as she worked at the laces of his leathers. So much so that he had to help her. Having removed the last dregs of their clothing, she was stopped short by the look on his face. It was as if he was seeing the sun for the first time. She smiled at him, taking in his own body as well. He was . . . beautiful. His strong shoulders flowed seamlessly into his perfectly sculpted arms. The light from the fireplace danced along his hard body and she felt herself go weak in the knees as she allowed herself to look at his manhood.

"Makers breath your beautiful," he whispered, speaking aloud what she had been thinking about him only moments ago. She felt herself blush under his gaze.

Reaching forward, Sebastian pulled her into him, wrapping his arms around her. Her bare body against his sent goose bumps running across her skin. She could feel his deep breaths and she looked up at him. His eyes were closed and he seemed to be steadying himself. His nervousness was endearing. Slowly he ran his fingers up her arms and back down, seemingly afraid to do more than that. She took his hands in hers and guided them along her body, reveling in the feel of his calloused fingers gliding along the peaks of her breast and across the flat planes of her stomach. He let out a soft moan as she leaned forward and gently swept her lips across his collarbone. Lacing her fingers through his, she led him around to the bed where she pulled down the linens and climbed in. He watched her, smiling shyly, before he lowered himself onto his hands and knees and crawled across the bed towards her. She smiled, and welcomed him as he hovered over her, his lips meeting hers. She could feel her anticipation growing as their tongues danced. Felt her raging desire as he placed himself between her eager legs and blanketed her body with his own. It was then that he stopped, hanging his head and refusing to look at her. Taking his face in her hands, she forced him to meet her gaze, her eyes searching his questioningly. He only shook his head and closed his eyes.

"Sebastian," she breathed.

With his brow furrowed once more, he looked as if he were fighting with himself again. She had known it would not be easy for him to break his vows, and apart of her still felt guilty for pursuing him so vigorously. But they were here now, and she wanted to give herself to him fully. But not . . . not if it caused him such inner turmoil.

"Sebastian," she said again to his closed eyes. "We don't have to . . . we can stop if you'd like."

He opened his eyes, his sharp gaze taking her breath away completely. "No."

That was all that she needed to hear. She smiled and kissed him, opening herself to him. His body shook as he eased himself inch by incredible inch inside her, her legs quivering as he filled her completely. Everything was perfect in this moment. She reveled in the pure rapture of his touch, each thrust bringing her to the brink of ecstasy. Their lips found one another and she took from his kiss everything she could. She allowed her fingers to rake through his hair as she lifted her hips to meet him with hungry ardor. She felt whole. As if this was always where her life had meant to be. With him. Her body arched backwards, a cry of passion escaping her lips as a pleasurable wave ran through her. She felt his lips on her chin and as she lowered her head. He was there, waiting to kiss her again. She knew with certainty by the look in his eyes that he would always be there.

She could feel the slow and growing pulsing within her, as her inner walls tightened around his throbbing member. Several times he slowed his thrusting; steeling himself against the urge to give into his release as if trying to prove to her that he would be a generous lover. She was grateful. His hands roamed her body with eagerness, his apprehension from before gone. She trembled beneath the feel of his caress. She wished he would never stop. With sudden ferocity, her body exploded, her limbs tingling as ecstasy rocked her body. She jerked forward, biting into his shoulder and clinging to him as she cried out in unabashed abandon. He held her tightly as he sensed her release, his pace quickening. Suddenly his own cry escaped his lips, his whole body shaking as he finally allowed his own release.

Panting, he laid his head upon her bare breasts. Her heart was pounding, and it was awhile before their breathing began to slow. Gently, he lifted himself from her and rolled onto his back. She did not hesitate to seek shelter in the comfort of his arms, laying her head upon his chest, and draping her leg over his. His fingers grazed her arm lazily as they savored the last remnants of their exertions. The silence was a comfortable one and she realized with elation that she could stay like this forever if the Maker willed it so.

"So what now?" She asked, finally deciding to break the silence that they had both become content with. She had started tracing circles on his beautifully sculpted chest, enjoying the feel of his skin beneath her fingers.

"Now . . . I follow you until you send me away." He said solemnly.

"And if I never send you away?" She asked, her brow arching as she lifted her head to meet his eyes.

"Then I will be the luckiest man in all of Thedas." He smiled, kissing her forehead. "I love you Jade."

"And I love you Sebastian."

Returning her head to his chest, she cast her eyes to the window where the first rays of dawn began to stream through. She found peace in his arms, and soon his rhythmic breathing lolled her into her own serene slumber, the world outside ceasing to exist.


End file.
